Prophetic

 

Sometimes you tell yourself just what you need to hear.

Last night I dreamt that some people came to visit us.  People to whom we are connected.  People who I will not name.  The visit went as well as could be expected with these folks.  Then I got a letter.

The letter was only partially readable.  Some words were missing or partially missing, as if the printer they used was running out of ink.  Reading this, I could see their disappointment in me.  I was crestfallen.  I had been so inconsiderate on their visit.  I had caused others pain.  That is never the person I intended to be.

Then, after several days of crying and misery, I re-read the letter. 

It turns out I could just make out all the missing letters and words if I really tried.  They had actually typed the letter and the imprint of the letters was on the paper even if there was no ink to make them stand out.  It took some doing, but I was able to make out the entire message.

And the message had changed entirely.

They still were expressing their disappointment but it was different.  The diappointment was with who I was fundamentally.  How I conducted my life.  My values. Nothing I had done, per se, but who I was.

And my sadness lifted.  I hadn't done anything to offend other than be who I was.  And I like who I am. All of the sudden, I knew: it wasn't about me, it was about them.  And years of burden lifted. 

Wow, just wow.

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PS: Lest you think all of the dream was prophetic, there was one point where we were visiting a building that did not allow pets and I distinctly remember my exasperation at Stella having brought her sow and piglet on leashes, to this.  And how the girls whined and cajoled and finally walked the pigs back outside. 

Not all dreams should come true.

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Fine print
*       - not even scientifically studied.  If it has been, I have not read about it.
**     - not true
***   - totally NOT a coincidence
**** - your body won't care at all.  Thanks will not be forthcoming.