Alien invasion? Unlikely, but possible....


  

What is that children do with towels? Every week, Brian or I hang up fresh towels in the bathroom. One for each person, with some extras for a safety net. I then take a shower, dry off with said towel and hang it up to dry. We live in freaking Colorado, it's dry here so using a towel for a week is completely reasonable. You are clean when you dry off and it dries instantly in our -7% humidity.

Fast forward to day 2 of the week. I go in the bathroom to take a shower...where are the fucking towels!?! There is maybe one towel left. Maybe.

Where did they go? Abducted by aliens seems unlikely so I turn to the children, since before they sprung from my loins, I never seemed to have this trouble. I ask, trying to keep the “I would like to wring your little neck” sound out of my voice, “Oh loveliest of progeny, where might ALL of our towels have gone?”

Some responses:

  • I took a shower
  • We went swimming
  • I spilled something
  • I left it somewhere
  • I took it outside to pound rocks on
  • I wrapped up the chicken in it
  • The dog was wearing it as a cape
  • It's a bed for my stuffed animals
  • I used it for an ice pack
  • We were painting
  • Oh, on the trampoline
  • You know how I was doing that one thing, one time? Yeah, I needed towels.
  • and the most popular response, “I don't know.”

When I got married, 20 years ago, we got approximately 429 towels as gifts. Those are, well, 20 years old and therefore are now rags. The children could use those for all of their endearing experiments. Why must they take the ones that are specifically set aside for drying off after showering?!

On a completely unrelated note, anyone seen all of our spoons? They seem to be disappearing faster than socks in a dryer....





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