Panic attack! Don't worry, it wasn't exactly real.

 

Last night I dreamt I put the kids in school.  I didn't want to, but I was trying it out because so many people I know were doing it.  They convinced me to try it.

So here I was, standing in a room full of desks watching my kids do their math.  Stella was doing math she already knew.  All the kids would do one problem at a time and wait until everyone was done before moving the the next problem.

I was talking with another mom who was there too, someone I knew.  I was having a serious panic attack.  Why did I put them in school? It is a huge waste of time? Didn't they see how much time was wasted just by having so many kids to deal with? I could get them through more math in less time in two sessions a week!

I was hyper, my body felt like a live wire.  My heart was racing, my breath coming quickly.  I was bouncing on the balls of my feet wanting to run over and scoop up my children and bolt from the school.  Why was I doing this? I am so against this type of schooling for my kids!

The other mom kept holding me back, hand on my arm, explaining how things worked and why they did things the way they did.  Didn't I want an easy transcript for college applications? And look at what a good job the teacher was doing. This is the best curriculum. 

Didn't help, I was panicked.

It was like when I've made other decisions in life that went against what I really should have done.  When those things were something I had to do that compromised who I am.  Those other choices might have been right for someone else, but they were not right for me.  Just like putting my children in school wouldn't be right for me.  For them.

Fortunately, this time, I was able to wake up.  Yes, it's still with me but, no, it's not real.



This is your friendly reminder to vote. All you do is click, which takes you to the website where you then do nothing. Or you can do something, but you don't have to do something. It's easy. Thanks :)

1 comments:

Post a Comment