42 and counting...

Today I am 42 years old. Forty was a tough one for me. You see none of my relatives have lived past 80, so I was 1/2 way through my life. Half. Way. Through. My. Life. That's huge. You think you should have accomplished something by that point. Be stable in a job. That you love. Or at least like. Have enough money to not be living paycheck-to-paycheck. Little things like that :P

Compound those thoughts with a husband who when you turned 39 started teaching your children to call you "old." Yes, he thinks he's funny. No, it didn't make turning 40 very easy for me.

Now, at 42, I still don't have enough money (the same place there) or know what I want to be when I grow up (same thing there too, huh) but I've come to terms with it enough that it doesn't depress me. I thought for today, I'd do something easy and just list 42 random things about me in completely random order:

1. I'm an introvert. INFJ, if you must know :)
2. I'm eating french toast for breakfast because you get whatever you want for breakfast and dinner on your birthday. Brian and Stella are making it for me (and everyone.) Tonight we'll have Shepard's pie
   
3. We shop for "new" things almost entirely at thrift stores and garage sales. I love sifting through everything to find the gems. The kid prefer it too. As Stella said, "I like to have the shirt or whatever that there's only 1 of. At Target there's like 20 of each one." Plus it's cheaper that way. We can't always buy used though, and certainly don't for underwear or socks.
   
4. I love autumn and Halloween. You can see posts about these obsessions in September and October.
   
5. I'm a worrier.
6. I love books. I love to read. I could spend all day reading and it wouldn't be a wasted day at all.
7. If I take time to "do nothing" I feel lazy.
8. I am a Unitarian Universalist, and have been for most of my adult life, but I didn't discover that I was until 2004. It was then I started attending Foothills UU Church.
   
9. I'm a free-range parent and always have been, before I knew there was a name for what I was doing.
10. I had the same thing with Attachment Parenting. That's what I was doing with my kids and then I realized there was a name for it. Seems I do things and then find my group?
    
11. I like the Green Bay Packers and have since I was a little girl. Other teams I support include the Colorado Avalanche, Milwaukee Brewers, Colorado Rockies, Wisconsin Badgers and CSU Rams.
    
12. I used to tailgate for 4 hours before every home CSU football game and several hours afterward. We always traveled to WYO and AF games but also saw the team play at Nebraska(L) and Michigan State(W). The most exciting was the 42-41 win over AF in 2006, a game where the Rams scored 28 unanswered points in the 4th quarter alone.
    
13. I love my iPod Touch. If it was the new version, it would be the perfect device because it would include a camera. Still, it hooks up to free wi-fi allowing me to use the internet pretty much whenever I want without paying a single dime in monthly fees (which a smart phone would charge.)
14. I have a master's degree in entomology from CSU. I decided I wanted to go back to school and bugs seemed cool. Yeah, it was that thought out.
15. I really enjoy FaceBook as a way to connect with people. I get to see a small window into my friends' lives. My friends both far and near. I'm able to stay close that way and not lose people. It's so much easier for them (or me) to say something to everyone then to try and call or email individual people. People may say it's a time sink, but to me, it's time I enjoy spending so it's "me time." And I don't care that it's public either. Really, I don't count on anything said on FB to be private in anyway. Same for this blog. Or YahooGroups. Or various forums. They aren't private.
    
16. I don't know what I want to be when I grow up. Ideas include: researching insect vectors, women's studies, vet or vet assistant, teaching, counseling, some sort of home creative business, photography. I wish I could decide and move forward but I really can't figure it out!!!!
17. My favorite color is green.
18. My favorite animal is the red panda.
19. I have been to Germany, Denmark, Sweden and Canada.
20. If I was rich, I'd have a million bags. I love purses and bags and can never find the exact right one.
21. I've had thyroid surgery, a hysterectomy and knee surgery twice. I've also been hospitalized one other time, besides the surgeries and not including Sandis' birth.
22. I had extreme chronic fatigue for almost 2 years. So bad I couldn't walk around a grocery store without having to rest for a day and a half. I didn't return the cart to the corral because it cost me too much. I think that CFS has been with me through out my life and will continue to be, waxing and waning, reminding me to not over do things. But my hope is that it is never that bad ever again.
    
23. Stella was born at home. On purpose. Because of how the hospital treated Sandis' birth as a medical event, even with a midwife and doula. I knew I could do it and I did. Not only that, but my friend who attended to care for Sandis (who was there for her sister's birth), said that I was incredibly calm and quiet. I did it, and I did it well ;)
24. I nursed my kids until they were 3 yrs 9mo and 4yrs 1mo. Sandis self-weaned, Stella I had to wean due to health reasons. It still makes me sad that I had to do that, even knowing that it was the best choice :(
    
25. I learned how to and played ice hockey as an adult. I love, love, LOVE playing hockey. It it totally and completely the coolest game on earth.
26. I have owned the following pets in my life: dogs, cats, rabbits, hamsters, various fish, mice, rats, parakeets, pacman frog, other frogs, various lizards, various snakes, turtle, ferrets, spiders, praying mantises and a cool metallic ground beetle. I kind of like everything :)
27. My favorite radio station is KBCO 97.3 which plays alternative.
28. My favorite bands are Barenaked Ladies, Steven Page, They Might Be Giants, and The Who with honorable mention going to Sheryl Crow.
29. Favorite TV shows have been ER, Boston Legal, Arrested Development, Weeds, Breaking Bad and Big Love.
30. Favorite movies are The Nightmare Before Christmas, The Usual Suspects and Pulp Fiction.
31. My favorite coffee drink is a gingerbread latte.
32. My favorite alcoholic drink is a Deschutes Jubelale.
33. I really want a family vacation to a deserted beach where we can stay in a small cabin and play in tide pools. And another one to DC. And yet another to Germany. Anyone want to contribute to that fund? :P
34. I'm dyslexic, had 2 lazy eyes and have such poor vision that at 18mo old I had glasses and they were trifocals.
35. One thing I don't mind about aging is the gray hairs. They actual add some depth to the blah color of my hair.
    
36. I have no trouble with public speaking. I have even been told that I am good at it :)
37. I've been told I'm a good writer as well.
    
38. I have a lot of depression with just a bit of mania. And when I get manic, I love to shop, but never can find anything I want to buy - so I do ok with it.
39. I really enjoy organizing things like closets and homeschool schedules.
40. I wish I could move to Wisconsin. I love it here, I love the people here, but that will always be home.
41. I'm a creative person. I can sense when things look right. I love that part of me. But I can't make that part of me into a career because then it will be work instead of fun.
42. I didn't truly discover my feminine side until after my second girl was born. Now I embrace it where before I wished it didn't even exist.

Whew! I made it to 42! That took quite awhile. Hopefully you've made it to the end :) I'm sure there are many, many more things about me I could have shared but those are the first 42 that I though of. If you'd like to know something I missed, ask in the comments!